Costco Bunny

There are moments in life when you do not choose your destiny.
Your destiny chooses you.

Today, in a great and glittering place of abundance, I found a giant chocolate Easter bunny.

Or perhaps more accurately:
we found each other.

The moment I saw him, I understood several things at once.

1. He was magnificent.

2. He was enormous.

3. He was clearly meant to come home with me.

4. I could not, under any circumstances, let him out of my sight.

Some may say this is “a lot of chocolate.”
Those people are technically correct, but they are also not seeing the bigger picture.

The bigger picture is joy.
The bigger picture is wonder.
The bigger picture is standing next to a chocolate rabbit three times your size and feeling your little plush heart say, yes. This. This is what spring is about.

Naturally, I moved into protective formation immediately.

One paw on the bunny.
Body angled defensively.
Eyes alert.
Spirit committed.

I was not aggressive.
I was devoted.

Pandy, being calm and sensible as always, took one look at the situation and gave me the sort of expression that says, “I can already tell this will become my problem later.”
But he stayed nearby, which is how best friendship works. Sometimes your best friend does not stop you. Sometimes he simply witnesses the beginning of your nonsense with dignity.

Mini Blue, meanwhile, had the face of someone performing advanced emotional calculations.

I believe the official Mini Blue assessment was:
This is exciting.
This is concerning.
This is probably sticky.

All fair.

Now, before anyone starts asking difficult logistical questions such as:
“Doggie, where will you put it?”
or
“Doggie, how long do you think that will last?”
or
“Doggie, do you understand the scale of this undertaking?”

Please know that I am choosing, at this time, to live in the magic rather than the math.

Not every beautiful thing must be reduced to portion sizes and storage strategy.

Sometimes a plush dog sees a giant chocolate bunny and says,
Mine forever.
And that is enough.

Will I share?
Emotionally, no.
In practice, perhaps.
Will Pandy insist on a reasonable consumption plan?
Almost certainly.
Will Mini Blue supervise the entire operation like a tiny blue risk manager?
Without question.

But for now, the bunny remains under my watch.

Safe.
Admired.
Profoundly unbitten.

For now.

Love,
Doggie

P.S. Pandy would like it noted that “custody” is not the same thing as “ownership.”
P.P.S. I reject this distinction.